This question is about wedding etiquette. My nephew is getting married in June. It is an evening wedding, a fairly large one, in a church. I have a lovely dress I bought for my Easter dress. It is a long one. One of my sisters says that guests DO NOT wear long dresses to weddings. Only the wedding party does. Is she right? If so, I have to go buy another dress! Sometimes this sister makes me sooo upset! She thinks she knows everything about what is proper and what is not. I'd appreciate any advice y'all can give me.

I don't know that I have ever seen anyone wear a long dress to a wedding other than the wedding party. BUTTTTT if I had one already and didn't want to shorten it, I'd wear it. I'd be darned if I would buy a new one just for one wedding. My opinion is that they had better be more concerned that you bothered to come to their wedding and bring a gift than what you are wearing. Hey, is there any way you can fold up the bottom temporarily. LOL.

Is the problem with it being long that you are trying to show up the wedding party? You could wear a sign that says, "I am not in the wedding party."

Years ago, it was unheard of for a lady to wear pants to church for services. Now they not only wear pants but wear jeans or shorts too. Not just THEY, I wear pants and have worn dress jeans with dressy shoes and top. SO THERE!!!

Last Sunday, our pastor wore black pants and a black and grey striped shirt----open collar. Two young men in the center aisle taking up the offering and one of them wore a shirt that the tail hung down his backsides. I remember back when one of the faithful members who hated wearing suits was told he couldn't be an usher because he didn't have a jacket and tie on. OHHHH that made my blood boil.

Tell your sister if she wants you to wear something else to pick something out of your closet or buy you something she approves of.

Esther I haven't got a clue but I did find this on the net to help you out a bit:

The proper wedding attire for guests of the bride or groom is often a fashion conundrum.

You want to be the envy of your stylish gaggle of girlfriends in the latest designer frock, but you do not want to upstage the blushing bride on her wedding day intentionally.
Here’s how to answer the dreaded and age-old question, “What should women wear to a wedding?”
If the wedding requires “Formal White Tie” wedding attire

Break out your ball gown and dust off your jewel-encrusted Giuseppe Zanottis; you are going to an evening wedding party. What is the wedding attire fashion code?

Think White House Dinner with the President and Mrs. O.

A woman should wear a gown that is floor length to formal evening wedding. No need to wear white gloves, (unless you are just fabulous) but your best accessories, smoky-eyed featured makeup and diamond jewelry should make an appearance at this formal wedding reception.

But remember: No tea length or short dresses allowed.

* What about the fellas? Men will wear tuxedos with white tie and often tails.

If the wedding requires “Black Tie” wedding attire

Black tie wedding attire indicates that the wedding will remain formal but Cinderella-ball gown dresses are not required.

A woman will have to wear a dress that grazes the floor or is at least mid-calf length.

Glitz and glamour is not optional at a black tie wedding, so pump up the volume with an amazing cocktail dress adorned with sparkle and shine and killer evening shoes.

If you need more clues as to what wedding attire is perfect for the Black Tie wedding, tune into the Oscars and Emmys for style hints.

* What about the fellas? Men will wear dark tuxedos with bow ties or standard-length ties with a Windsor knot.

If the wedding requires “Formal or Black Tie Optional” wedding attire

When you read the words ‘Formal or Black Tie Optional” the bride is telling you that the evening wedding is dressy but a floor-length sequined gown is optional.

Female wedding guests of the bride and groom should wear long dresses but choose a dress that is a step above your favorite “paint-the-town-red” cocktail dress.

* What about the fellas? Just like the Black Tie wedding attire mentioned above: Men will wear dark tuxedos with bow ties or standard-length ties with a Windsor knot.

If the wedding requires “Dressy Casual or Semiformal” wedding attire

Dressy casual or Semiformal wedding attire allows the wedding guest more sartorial options.

You can wear a riveting, but not too revealing, cocktail dress for an evening wedding or a bold floral strapless ensemble–paired with a magnificent colored straw dress hat–for a summer morning wedding.

No flat sandals or ballet flats allowed at a semiformal or dressy casual wedding reception (even if it lasts long into the wee hours) only your best shoes, strappy sandals and glam pumps will do.

* What about the fellas? Finally, men are released from the grasp of the boring dark tuxedo for their wedding attire. However, a suit and a tie are still required wedding wardrobe options for men.

If the wedding requires “Casual” wedding attire

Casual wedding attire gives the well-dress woman a plethora of fashion possibilities. To prevent wearing the wrong dress or pantsuit, ask yourself three questions:

* What would the bride wear if she were a wedding guest?
* What dress or outfit do I usually select for special events and weddings?
* What is the location and time of the event?

By answering these three questions, you will always be appropriate whether the wedding is on the beach in Jamaica or in the backyard of your Grandparents’ grand estate.

If you still need fashion tips, a simple knee-length black dress in a sumptuous fabric, or a classic linen shift or sheath in silk or wool crepe for spring or summer is always appropriate and elegant.

Still clueless? (Think first impression attire for a first date or the introductory meeting with your man’s parents.)

* What about the fellas? Casual wedding attire for men includes a pair of dress pants and a casual shirt or a dark or light colored suit without the tie.

Because wedding invitations have cryptic code words like” Black Tie Optional” and” Dressy Casual” the well-dressed woman needs a fashion cheat sheet to determine what to wear to a wedding.

Before you grab your plastic AMEX to shop for the perfect dress for wedding guests this season, use this wedding attire guide to get gorgeous…whether you are poised to catch the bridal bouquet or not.

My friends and relatives wouldn't give a hoot about what I wore, especially a nephew. His bride might though. LOL. I don't think I want to go to a wedding that is giving me so much worry about how I look. Just me I guess. I'd have to leave Pete home anyway because he's never had or worn a tux.

Esther why don't you borrow those daisy dukes from that old lady w/ the cellulite body?

I've never heard that guests should not wear floor length dresses, especially if the wedding is a formal one. I have been to many a wedding where guests wear long dresses. Maybe etiquette/tradition is different in different parts of the country.

If your sister is going to get in a snit about it sometimes it is better just to keep the peace. Do you have a friend who might have something you could borrow? Do you have something in your closet that you could dress up with some accessories? Maybe you could find something at a consignment or resale store for a good price.

I know what you mean about spending money on a outfit to wear once to a wedding. I just cleaned my closet and I found several things that I have only worn once or twice. The sad thing is that most of them I don't fit in anymore - I'm working on it though so I'm hanging on to them.

By June (the wedding month), I may have to buy another dress anyway. I've lost 10 pounds in one month! If I lose much more, the dress I have will be too BIG! Whoopie!

rosebud wrote:By June (the wedding month), I may have to buy another dress anyway. I've lost 10 pounds in one month! If I lose much more, the dress I have will be too BIG! Whoopie!

Sorry Rosebud I don't know why I though Esther started this thread but anyway just take out all the comments to Esther and replace your name and all will be good