Smaug's missing scale.

I don’t know if you are familiar with the book “The Hobbit” or not but it was a nightly ritual in our house when the kids were young. Around bedtime I’d light a few candles, douse the lights and read this to them until they dozed off. Bilbo Baggins was a mild mannered character who loved eating. The Wizard approached him and told him that he was to lead a group to the lair of Smaug, the dragon. He would then serve as a burglar to infiltrate the dragon’s lair.

Of course Bilbo wanted nothing of this but as the tale went on he emerged as a leader. By the time they got to Smaug’s cave he crept in silently but the dragon caught his scent. Using the ring of power, he was invisible. The huge dragon had been laying on a pile of treasure so his entire chest and under belly was encrusted in jewels. Bilbo notice that he was missing one scale, right over his heart. Later, with this information, an archer is able to kill Smaug by placing an arrow right where he had no armor.

I work with a young guy, mid twenties. He is married and has three small children. He is a tall, good looking guy who openly reads the Bible at work and debates it with his friend Joe who believes that the Bible was written by man. But This guy has a weakness, a missing scale. He cheats on his wife with several women, two of which work with him. One of them is becoming openly affectionate to him at work, there is a lot of teasing, poking and playing going on.

I waited until we were alone and told him that everyone was talking about his philandering, everyone and if it did not stop, his marriage would be ruined. He denied that it was his fault at all, that they came on to him. I asked him if her ever read the Hobbit and he had. I explained that it was not the women, but Satan. He knew where that one scale was missing and right where to aim to destroy him. He see’s you reading that Bible and doesn’t want to loose you, he knows your weak spot and knows just where to place that arrow.

The other two guys at work on our crew are teasing him about his shenanigans and I jokingly called him “Tiger.” They thought it was hilarious, printed out a picture of Tiger Woods and hung it on his locker with “For a good time call” his phone number.

His friend Joe called me after work yesterday and said the “Tiger” thing was tearing him up. He showed Joe his cell phone, he had deleted the other girls phone numbers and lewd text messages that he had saved like some trophy.

I think my talk actually did him some good if he stays the course.

Great analogy, Bullfrog!

It would have been easier to stay silent rather than risking this guy gitting mad at you. It sounds like you were not judgmental but opened his eyes. I'm sure he'll think of what you said the next time he is tempted. Praying that he stayes the course. You may have saved a marriage and a soul. :[IMG]2thumbs01

WOW BULLFROG!! Kudos to you. So many things to comment on. You know me I've been there!! LOL. No I wasn't the one being pursued by many men but my X did have an affair and left me about 27 years ago. Having seen this type of behavior during my 67 years both by people who have no religious connection and those who do, I ache for them. Obviously your friend----what is his name by the way---needs this validation by OTHER women. Maybe his wife doesn't do that. Even then that is no excuse to do what he is doing. You know ugly people have an easier time staying faithful. LOL. But maybe with your example and mentoring, he will find the guts to do what he promised his wife when they married. Obviously, he also is proud that these women are attracted to him, otherwise why the bragging to Joe? If I were Joe, I'd have said, "That's disgusting. Change your phone number because a married man shouldn't be getting crap like that. Does your wife know this is going on?" He'd hate me and I'd probably get no where influencing him. LOL

Bullfrog, I will pray for you that God will guide you to know the best way to help your friend. I wonder what he is reading in the Bible. Is it for show? Because he certainly isn't finding anything there to encourage him in his present behavior. Breaks my heart when I hear of people who are so unsure of themselves that they jeopardize their marriages to find their ego.

Now that the enemy his discovered his weakness he will no doubt continue to prey on it. If you are fishing with many different lures and catch one with a purple worm most likely the next day you won't even bother to bring your whole tackle box, just a pocket full of purple worms. I used to be like him, thank God I was able to outgrow it before my marrage. I had to come to the realization that it wasn't really the lust that was getting me but pride, feeling like "I still got it" and having my friends be jealous of me. If my friends had reacted the opposite though it may have had an impact on me back then. God only knows. I love the hobbit analogy and I must admit that I'm going to steal it and use it myself

Esther and Stretch both nailed it, it is like a contest to him. It strokes his ego when the women throw themselves at him and he does egg it on. Joe is no help, he encourages it at times. There is a girl who does the hearing test on you annually and he obviously flirted with her as well. She was texting him at work and they made a bet that he could get her home phone number without asking for it.

Together they contrived messages like "I find you interesting and would like to know more about you." This went on until she showed the messages to her coworker Melissa. Melissa's husband is a union steward is is my cheating friend. He told Jesse "She is a stalker and a talker, she saved every message that you sent."


God does not like cheating, this will come to light. I'm going to talk to him some more and also tell Joe that as his friend he needs to not support this. The guy has three little children that adore him.

Even though the cheating may not be going as far as being sexual, he is betraying his wife and family AND HIMSELF emotionally and mentally. And opening the door just a crack for the possibility of the other. I'd ask him if his wife knew how he behaved at work. Or if he would be proud to have his children/mother/priest/pastor know. God already knows. He will no longer brag to you because he knows you don't approve. So if he's doing something he has to hide from you/his wife/pastor/priest/his children then he knows it is wrong. He seeks out Joe and others who will snicker and egg him on because either they do it too or wish they dared OR WISH THEY HAD HIS LOOKS and could do it too.

Oh it is sexual, he routinely takes a girl from work out to eat, calls Joe and asks if they can borrow his bedroom. He did thank me for talking honestly with him and being as he deleted the phone numbers and messages, maybe it is working on his heart.